1. Shopping is better than sex. At least if you're not satisfied, you can exchange it for something you really like.
Adrienne Gusoff
2. An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.
Agatha Christie
3. Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.
Albert Einstein
4. Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.
Albert Einstein
5. Men make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.
Anonymous
6. You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.
Anonymous
7. The four most important words in any marriage..."I'll do the dishes."
Anonymous
8. No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying.
Anonymous
9. Marriage is like jogging through a puddle of industrial strength rubber glue. You can work hard and make it through the struggles; however, you usually leave your bobby socks and sneakers behind along the way.
Anonymous
10. When a relationship goes flat, so does a couple of sets of car tires.
Anonymous
11. Men only have two faults... What they do, and what they say!
Anonymous
12. You can't buy love on eBay.
Anonymous
13. If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?
Bette Midler
14. A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him.
Brendan Francis
15. Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch.
Cathy Carlyle
16. Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter.
Cecilia Egan
17. The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then marry him.
Cher
18. Men aren't necessities, they're luxuries.
Cher
19. By the time you swear you're his, shivering and sighing, and he vows his passion is infinite, undying - Lady, make note of this: One of you is lying.
Dorothy Parker
20. I'm always looking for meaningful one night stands.
Dudley Moore